I used to have a Labrador retriever & was buying a large bag of Purina
at Wal-Mart, waiting in the check-out line. A woman behind me asked if
I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina
Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the
hospital last time.
But, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with
tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her
that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is
to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two
every time you feel hungry, as the food is nutritionally complete.
So, I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically
everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, especially a
tall heavy man behind her. Horrified, she asked how I'd ended up in the
hospital; if I'd been poisoned. I told her no; I'd been sitting in the
street licking my balls and a car hit me. The tall guy nearly had to
stagger out of the store, oxygen-depleted from laughter.
I paid for the food and left a lot of smiles behind me .
